Monday, November 17, 2008
should there be a second chance?
Like a cliche drama, I am going to start this post with 'one fine day'. 'One fine day' represents any normal day with a normal weather, meeting the usual people and doing the mundane things.
One fine day, TK, JC and I had lunch in a little hotel opposite the office. As usual, TK and JC were gossiping about school stuff and I was there listening. Half listening. The other part of my brain drifted to a complicated question that someone posted previously. (Ya - that someone was once an important person to me. So important that when e wanted out, I did the craziest things in attempt to keep him with me. That was the past... not so long ago)
Out of the blue (to me), TK mentioned this friend of hers who is dating her ex once again after breaking up for very long. This snapped me back to reality. So I asked, 'Since we are on this topic, would you go back to your previous boyfriends if given a choice?' Both their answers were negative and here's their reasons (something like that):
TK - 'there must had been something that didn't work for the two which was serious enough to cause a break-up. Both must have tried hard to overcome the problem and obviously it didn't worked. Since that is the case, i don't think i want to go back to a r/ship that won't work'
JC - 'r/ship is troublesome. since it had been problematic enough to cause a break up in the first place, why would i want to go back into the same problem?'
Both of them spoke in the same tune. I wished I had shared my problem with you when TK asked. But it didn't felt right at that point of time. If you haven't already guessed, ya - that once-very-important person asked if i still loved him. if i would give him another chance to make things work.
I don't what to do. I took a long time to stop crying for him, to stop having the urge to call him when i'm not suppose to. Really, i'm now at this all-guys-are-bastards stage and at the same time forgetting all my feelings for him. But in the midst of recovering, this question is like eating deep-fried sinful chicken wings while being on diet. Totally ruin the effect.
I have to admit my heart did skip a beat when i heard his confession. But at the same time, i cannot forget how he had treated me when he broke up with me. My reply to him was that i'll give him another chance after his exams, just so that this incident will not ruin his studying mood.
But really, what should I do? If there's a god, or Buddha, can you give me a sign? I have 2 weeks till the end of his exams. thank you.
SpilLeD by b|uE at 1:23:00 am
